Antonia

Computer Science Major. From Mexico. Female.

My questions are bolded. Her answers are normal.

Do you come from a family that values education?

All my family members are educated, on both sides.

Why did you enter university late? No judgement.

Mental illness. I didn't like going to school, I was only interested in the programming class and didn't like the other classes much. I was also dealing with a lot of anxiety and paranoia, I couldn't bear having to take a class on the 4th floor. I dropped out.

Does being in a predominantly male field bother you?

I don't think it has ever bothered me. In my first year there were quite a lot of girls but I don't think most of them really liked the field. I have one girl friend who didn't drop out and we are kinda like minded so it's nice.

What about when you wanted to date?

I wanted a girlfriend, but all of the women around me were heterosexual. I'm from a small town.

Are you diagnosed with anything that you want to disclose that you feel like heavily affects your interpersonal and academic prospects?

I think that my generalized anxiety disorder can always get out of control again whenever something that greatly impacts my life negatively happens. I remember I had it under control at 19 and then a huge earthquake came and I went back to having daily panic attacks. Then my mom died at 20 and it got worse.

Are you neurodiverse? Do you think you possibly have the presence of autistic traits?

Maybe. I got diagnosed by a psychiatrist at 16 but I think that with some disorders like this, where signs are generic and everyone can have some of them, a lot of people can get misdiagnosed.

Possible future?

I might try to get a Master's. I'm also interested in moving to a foreign country to escape the violence and the economy, but other than that I don't mind it here.

Feeling bored, outcast, and lonely because of being gay is tragically a common experience with gay and lesbians throughout the world. It's especially worsened by small towns, villages, or townships where it feels like there is essentially no safe way to meet people without fear of constant derision from family members, friends, and acquaintances. According to the CDC, gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth are three times more likely to have suicidal ideation, five times more likely to attempt suicide, two times more likely to feel sad or hopeless, and four and a half times more likely to attempt substance abuse. Source for data. Click here to go back to the index.